Falling Slowly

Scotty and I have decided to move in together. And, as you already know, we have found the perfect apartment complex that we wish to move to. Considering my past, moving in with someone is huge for me. HUGE. And I am scared to death. This is a leap of faith I'm terrified of taking again, last time, I fell only to be shattered at the bottom of a dark empty hole.

I moved in with my ex fiance about two months after we met. Not completely by choice. His lease was up, and my roommates were abandoning me in the middle of our lease. I didn't drive at the time and he felt bad for me, so we moved in together. About a year later he proposed, and then 4 months before the wedding he left. We were together nearly two years, living together for most of them. It felt like a divorce, minus the legal paperwork. I ended up with less than half of our possessions and broke. He moved on very quickly, while I had to move back in with my parents and shortly after that lost my job. That year was a rough year for me, but I learned a lot from my experiences.

I love Scotty, and I can't wait to marry him. But I also thought I loved my ex, and we were planning our wedding. Deja Vu keeps kicking in and I shut down for a bit. Scotty does his best to reassure me, and I believe him when he says he loves me, he'll never leave me, and that we are in this together for better or worse. His sincerity touches me and a strong, secure feeling warms my body from the top of my head to the tips of my toes. Scotty has even suggested that we draw up a contract that we are equally responsible for all bills related to the apartment, binding for 30 days after a separation or until we get married. But the "what ifs" are still in the back of my mind and I can't shake them completely.

In the past few days, the "what ifs" have quieted down. Things we've been a little worried about are falling into place. Items we need for our new apartment are suddenly appearing: a new bed, a dining room table, new bedside tables, a moving crew, a washer and dryer, and God knows what else will spring up between now and our moving date. It's like this is meant to be and fate is taking over making my worries soften and disappear. As each day passes, I feel better and  about making this step and starting this life with Scotty.

I especially can't wait to have our new bed :)

All images via weheartit.com

TMI Tuesday: The Here and Now

1. Are you wearing any jewelry? What?

I am wearing my engagement ring of course! As well as a Celtic knot ring on my right hand that looks like this --------------------->

Around my neck I am wearing a necklace my mom brought back for me from Alaska. Last, in my ears, in the second holes, I am wearing diamond studs. 

I don't wear jewelry. But I do wear the Bracelet that Nicole gave me.

2. What are you listening to now?

The gentle hum of my tiny desk fan and the clicking of my keyboard. There are muffled voices in the lobby of our building right outside the door and a from time to time I hear a car pass by.

Nicole trying to talk me into seeing a movie.

3. What is the last piece of entertainment media (i.e., cd, download, book, DVD) that you purchased? Do you recommend it?

A Thousand Years, by Christina Perri. I downloaded it to my iPhone on Wednesday.Definitely recommend it. Beautiful song.

Abraham Lincoln : Vampire Hunter  So far it is an awesome book.

4. What kind of undergarments are you wearing right now? Care to post a photo?

I am wearing a nude bra and silky gray panties with lace trim ;) Scotty got a peek before we left the house this morning.

Gray boxer briefs

5. What is your current mood?

BORED. It's very quiet in the office this week.

Tired

6. What is the best looking thing about you today?

My dress. It's new and it's colorful. Everyone has complimented me on it today.

My beard? I dress like a bum at work.

7. Fill in the blank. Tonight I’m looking forward to _____________ .

Snuggling up with Scotty and watching RuPaul's Drag Race.

Apparently seeing a movie w/ Nicole

Bonus: Tell me something good…anything you want to share. Just do it

We found the apartment complex we want to move to! And it's a decent commute for both of us! 

I second her answer

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How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblogfrom your website!

Weekend Roundup Week 4

Friday:
After work we went over to my mother's house for dinner and to play cards. We all got a little tipsy, but we had loads of fun. Scotty and I got home too late and we were far too tired to have sex, so we just snuggled up and went to sleep.

Saturday:
Scotty didn't have to work this weekend, so we slept in a little. When we did wake up Scotty complained that we hadn't properly consummated our engagement, and began to kiss and lightly caress my body,removing my soft cotton pajamas to open the path for his lips. His fingers roamed my skin, sliding over my nipples, my hips, my ass, my legs, and finally my pussy. It was warm and wet, ready for his touch. He guided me to orgasm with the flick of his fingers, then again with his tongue before he entered me and gave me a few more before his intense climax that filled me up and soaked my panties that were promptly put back on after our love making.
"What do you want to do today?" he asks as we're laying nearly naked among the mess of sheets, blankets, and pillows on our bed. "I dunno." I responded breathlessly.

We had to pick up a package at the post office, so we did get up and get going soon. Then his mother called and we met her and her boyfriend for lunch. "We're going to the Dogwood Festival down in Piedmont Park," she says to me over fried chicken and macaroni and cheese, "You wanna go with us?" I swallowed a bite of mashed potatoes, "Sure!" I looked over to Scotty, "You wanna go honey?" "I guess so." He responded, paying more attention to the barbecue ribs on his plate. After we finished eating, we piled up in the car and headed down to the city. It was cool seeing all the local art booths, but the funnel cake was by far my favorite thing about the festival.

When we finally got home, we settled in to have pizza and watch TV and drift off to sleep.

Sunday:
Scotty woke me up again with morning sex and then he was off to the car meet down at the baseball stadium with his buddies. I stayed in bed watching TV and reading. When Scotty got home, we talked about the offer my landlord had made us versus moving to an apartment complex. After going over our finances a little bit and the pros and cons of each option, we decided that we are moving into a new apartment. This means, a FULL kitchen :) and no crazy house guest.

Happy with our decision and all the hype and excitement over our recent engagement, I woke Scotty back up after we had gotten in bed for some celebratory sex. He protested at first saying it was too late and he was tired, but after a tiny bit of coaxing, he was right on board for a quickie. Then sleep came easy for us both, not just him.

We're Engaged!

That's right! As of yesterday (Thursday, April 19, 2012) at about 6:45am!

I had an inkling that it was coming, but I didn't know when. Scotty had been trying to sneakily ask about my ring size and what not last weekend and early this week. Then yesterday morning, after my second of four alarms (it takes a lot for me to wake up in the morning) Scotty rolls over and snuggles up to spoon me.

He whispers, "Hey, are you awake?"
I sleepily opened my eyes a bit and croaked in my just-woke-up-why-are-you-trying-to-converse-with-me voice, "I'm coherent. Why?"
"I've got something for you."
I rolled my eyes. I could feel his morning boner pressed against my butt. Oh lord, we don't have time for all of that. I've got to get up for work and make lunches for us. I thought to myself, but out loud I said, "What is it?"
Scotty slides his hand down the length of my arm.
Seriously, we don't have time for this. I groaned internally.
When his hand reached mine, he fumbled for a tiny moment, (I found out afterwards he was counting my fingers in the dark, to make sure he got the right one) then slipped a ring on my finger. "Nicole, will you marry me?"
A HUGE smile spread across my face. "Yes!" I rolled over and kissed him madly.

We lay there talking for a moment, awake earlier than usual. So happy. Then in a fit of passion and love, we hastily undressed and had a quickie before getting up and dressed for work. I wore my current favorite outfit to compliment the most perfect ring ever. I was trying not to bring attention to it at the office, cause I wanted to tell my mom later that morning before telling everyone else, but that didn't happen. One person noticed and then there was a swarm of well wishers surrounding me. I'm not one to enjoy being the center of attention like that, so I was slightly uncomfortable all morning. The hype died down a bit by the afternoon.

The ring is perfect. Exactly what I wanted. Being a normal warm-blooded women on Pinterest, I've been Pinning my wedding ideas and such for months. And this ring, and variations of it have flooded my Wedding Idea's board. Scotty is on Pinterest too, and he follows me. So, I just assumed that he perused my wedding board to get inspiration, but when I mentioned it to him, he looked at me confused. So I pulled up my Pinterest and showed him. There were at least six on this exact style pinned. He was so pleased with himself for choosing the perfect ring that I wanted without help, and I was amazed and fell that much more in love with him for knowing me so well to be able to choose this ring all by his self.

Soon I was bombarded with excited, congratulatory text messages, tweets, and phone calls. Scotty's boss got him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations Scotty and Nicole!" on it. And I'm almost positive my office will do something for me at some point.

We are both so happy, as are our families and friends. And now to the fun bit of making wedding plans. I can't wait to start!